Dear Mr Rick Moranis…

Dear Richard Moranis,

How are you? I hope you have been well. My friend George told me last week that you are writing a history of the periodic table. Is this true? I do hope so, and would like to express my interest in purchasing a copy.

If you are not writing such a tome, I wish you every luck in your other endeavours and apologise for any embarrassment caused.

Yours,
–
Herbert Rumbelow

P.S. If not true, I will set the record straight with George.

Dear Mr Stewie Griffin…

Dear Stewie,

If you are receiving this email I will be very disappointed as it will mean that my friend George (a Liberal) will have won a packet of Riesen chocolate chews from me. He bet me that Hotmail is available in Quahog, I felt otherwise.

Yours,

Herbert Rumbelow