Dear Tulisa,
Do you love Dick? Van Dyke I mean of course, not Francis (his prose does not sit well to my ear). I am a huge fan of Mr VD’s work and, along with my friend George, am preparing a series of stained glass windows bearing his likeness. These range from him as a foetus surrounded by a choir of children to a black and white depiction of DvD diagnosing a murder (a French businessman seemingly strangled by a lover during a game of chess).
I am looking for pre-orders for these windows, and would like to offer you the chance to have one installed in your home, office or car. If you are interested, please let me know and I can send a series of initial mock-ups created using old pairs of 3D glasses.
Yours,
—
H. Rumbelow
Herbert Rumbelow's Weblog 